Before ...

I'm sitting at the desk in my apartment, and I'm listening to Third Day. I haven't listened to these guys for a long time. Boy, do they bring back memories. I discovered Third Day when I first became a Christian, and I lacked the language to describe all of those new feelings -- lovely, delicious feelings. Listening to the likes of Third Day, Jars of Clay, and Jennifer Knapp helped me put words to everything. It's funny how you can listen to a song and instantly be taken back to a certain time in your life. When I was in college I had Nichole Nordeman and Kutless. Their songs used to accompany me to the prayer room or the rose garden, and we witnessed many sunsets together. Now I'm listening to them again, and they take me back to Before. Before the anxiety attacks, bills, and life. I miss Before. I want to be the same girl I was Before. God seemed closer Before. He doesn't change. The God of Before is the God of Now, and the God of What's to Come. So why am I missing Before?